Survive three different planes of platforming in Mutant Mudds

Don’t let Mutant Mudds‘ colorful sprites, cute critters, and bouncy tunes fool you; this is one tough cookie. Well, technically it’s a platformer. And a serious test of one’s patience and ability to soldier on. Also, don’t be surprised to know there’s a story behind all that jumping, hovering, and shooting: Max, the blonde-haired, glasses-wearing main protagonist, is sitting in his living room playing videogames when a large meteor suddenly hits the planet. A TV news station then reports that there’s been a “Muddy” invasion. Equipped with only his water gun and jetpack, Max takes it upon himself to stop these Mutant Mudds…by collecting, um…y’know, end-of-level Water Sprites and gold diamonds. The stuff mutant piles of mud(d) hate the most.

Originally, I played a bit of Mutant Mudds on my laptop, using an Xbox 360 controller, as I find platformers extremely difficult with mouse and keyboard. I did not get very far though, maybe only earning 10 to 15 Water Sprites. But then, thanks to a swell promotion from Nintendo for purchasing both Fire Emblem: Awakening and Shin Megami Tensei IV with a set time period, I came into $30 worth of eShop money, just begging to be spent. I purchased Attack of the Friday Monsters! and Super Mario Bros. 2 some time back, but stopped there, unsure of what else to get. Then, without warning, I realized I needed two very difficult puzzle platformers for on-the-go gaming, and so I bought Mutant Mudds and VVVVVV; I’ll write about the latter later.

Anyways, I’ve actually done much better playing on the handheld than the PC, completing all the main levels in Mutant Mudds and collecting 20 Water Sprites and all the gold diamonds. The game actually uses 3D smartly, and I turned it on in several spots to help differentiate between the three planes of platforming. After completing the main-ish levels, I opened up four more levels dubbed “In Space No One Can Hear You Screaming In Frustration After Getting Hit By That Mud Monster That Spits.” At least that’s what I’ve been calling them. I’ve actually completed the first of the four new levels, but after many, many attempts, I just don’t see myself beating the rest. Timing is so essential, both in landing your jumps and moving fast to beat the ticking clock, and Max can only take three hits before its lights out; I thought level 4-4 was masochistically tough, but these space levels are that and then some.

While I avoid dying in space–and no, I’m not talking about Alfonso Cuaron’s Gravity–there are a couple other ways to distract myself in Mutant Mudds. Within each level, there are two alternative exits. One takes you to a mini-level stylized after the Virtual Boy and another goes to a place paying love and homage to the Game Boy. There are no gold diamonds in these, but if you complete them you can still acquire a Water Sprite at the end. These are nifty, and I’ve done a few, but finding the alt exits in the main level seems to require a specific power-up equipped, and I refuse to use anything other than the extended hover item. That’s right. I refuse.

I might try the lingering, menacingly taunting three space levels a few more times here and there, but don’t expect a “just beat” haiku any time soon. Which stinks, as I’m pretty close to the end.

Lastly: vanishing platforms can burn in Hell.

Nintendo 3DS and the final two months of 2013

The next two months are looking to be pretty fantastic for the Nintendo 3DS, with a lot of big name games coming out for the holiday season. However, there’s also a number of smaller, indie-esque titles that look just as interesting, so many that I felt the need to make this post to keep everything clear and tidy and all in one place, as well as a good reminder to myself to spend that cash money for digital entertainment when all of these things drop.

Now, I’m not covering every game coming out for the Nintendo 3DS over the following sixty days (a rough estimate), just the ones that I’m genuinely interested in. Sorry, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney – Dual Destinies. Let’s take a look then at those vying for my attention.

Pokémon X/Pokémon Y (October 12)

Ever since Pokémon HeartGold, the unwritten rule in my life now is that I will buy every new Pokémon game that comes out, no hesitation. And then I’ll play it for a bit, get stuck at a certain gym, and put it down for some time until I get that itch to go back. The newest iteration looks really neat, and I love that the battles will now be more animated. Plus, sounds like you can ride some Pokemon around town. That take, bicycle. From early reviews, it sounds like not a whole lot has changed gameplay-wise, but I’m okay with that. I just now have to figure out which one to get, X or Y, and I guess that really depends on what version Garbador is in, as that hunk of junk is my absolute favorite. Guess I gotta do some light research later on…

Hometown Story (October 22)

Having almost nearly given up all hope on a North American release for Fantasy Life, it looks like Hometown Story will have to fill my “take on a non-traditional role in an RPG” gaming void. It’s a life simulation game created by Harvest Moon creator Yasuhiro Wada wherein you run the small shop you inherited from your grandmother. You can interact with customers and watch both your shop and town grow in response. That’s all I know so far, but it looks cute and charming and I never did get around to trying out Recettear: An Item Shop’s Tale, so this will be my first taste of this niche genre.

Batman Arkham Origins Blackgate (October 25)

I don’t know much about the Batman games as of late, though I did eventually purchase Batman: Arkham Asylum for five bones during a PSN summer sale, but haven’t played it yet. Hopefully before the year’s out. Anyways, this Blackgate Metroidvania romp through a 2.5D prison space looks a lot like Shadow Complex–which I actually dipped back into recently and continue to enjoy–more my thing, and I’m real curious to see how faithful to its genre it stays or sways. I’m not a huge Batman fan, and not even LEGO Batman could sway me, but if this what I think it is and the billionaire’s array of expensive and effective gadgets are innovative enough to use, I’m in.

The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds (November 22)

My love for A Link to the Past demands I get this and see what Nintendo has construed in this so-called sequel to one of the best SNES games of all time. I am worrisome in that it looks kind of…lazily designed, and by that I mean that the world looks like a simple update of graphics, but I guess there will be all new dungeons. I also don’t yet grok the whole “turn into a piece of wall art” element, but I want to give this a fair shake. It might be riding a bit too freely on nostalgia’s back though, if you get what I’m saying, and that would be a dang shame, but a new Zelda game is few and far between these days, so this is a must-buy regardless.

Grinsia (Release date TBD)

This Grinsia looks like some straight-up, old-school JRPGing, and I’m a-okay with that, especially since it’ll be a downloadable title from the eShop. Sounds like some treasure hunters looking for special relics or something like that. Isn’t that the plot in Wild Arms? No matter! Give me, give me, give me.

Treasurenauts (Release date TBD)

In Treasurenauts, which comes from the same team that made the delightfully challenging Mutant Mudds, your goal is to collect enough treasure to pay for an escape from a perilous, uncharted island. It is an action platformer, and when you get hit, your treasure explodes from your body like those gold rings when Sonic would land on spikes, and then you have to maddeningly hurry to collect all your jews. Here’s an early tip then: don’t get hit. It looks like quite a lot of fun despite the simple premise, and hopefully there is more to the gameplay than what I’ve seen in trailers so far.

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And that’s all I can list for now, otherwise my wallet will just up itself from my pocket, flip me the bird, and run off into the Pennsylvania woods, to see if it is better off without me. Chances are it probably is.

2013 Game Review Haiku, #28 – WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgame$!

You have three seconds
To beat a bunch of bizarre
Lively minigames

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These little haikus proved to be quite popular in 2012, so I’m gonna keep them going for another year. Or until I get bored with them. Whatever comes first. If you want to read more words about these games that I’m beating, just search around on Grinding Down. I’m sure I’ve talked about them here or there at some point. Anyways, enjoy my videogamey take on Japanese poetry.

Getting lost in a digital Tokyo brimming with demons

If the Minotaur boss didn’t put you off on Shin Megami Tensei: IV, then getting to Tokyo for the first time surely will. I have to imagine it’s a stopping point for many. To be honest, I put the game down a couple weeks ago after first arriving in the largest metropolitan area in the world, unsure of where to go and with little desire to look up specific step-by-step directions. That’s not how I play. Unfortunately, the game does a very poor job of indicating where you are to go next while at the same time giving you dozens of doors to open and places to enter and explore and demons to fight to keep you busy for long enough that you don’t even realize you’re technically going nowhere.

Some soft story spoilers in this paragraph, folks. When you first arrive in Tokyo, you are hot pursuit of the Black Samurai, who everyone believes did some bad things back in the Kiccigiorgi Forest countryside. I am with everyone, though I bet there’s going to be a twist as to who the Black Samurai actually is. Previously, all overworld exploration was done via menu selection, such as Castle Entrance or Lake. You then explore the dungeons in a traditional third-person perspective. However, all of this changes with Tokyo, where you now explore using a zoomed-out overhead map; other sub-areas on the map, just like dungeons, are explored traditionally. On the overworld map, demons are represented as pixelated squares that still make a beeline for you when spotted, and you can interact with exclamation marks to enter buildings or other areas. Right away, you are given a lot more freedom to explore–and places to explore–than ever before, and that can be a bit daunting. Your first goal is the underground section below Ueno Station, which is your new hub for Tokyo, providing a shop, a bar, and lots of unclean people to chat up. From there, your next main quest is to find the military base, which I can’t seem to do by naturally stumbling across it.

So far, I’ve done a sidequest about killing a demon at Shinobazu Pond, as well as unlocked another fast travel terminal after another tough demon boss that can quickly wipe your entire team out in a single turn if you don’t pay attention to the Press Turn system. I’m mainly running around the Ueno District though, picking up respawning relics, selling them off for sweet, precious Macca, and leveling up my odd assortment demons. It’s progress, but a different kind. On occasion, I fuse, but that’s still a pretty scary process.

One neat thing I got to recently try out was the StreetPassing functionality for Shin Megami Tensei IV. Thanks to that new relay system that just went live and a few trips to Walmart, I’ve gotten a couple of StreetPasses from others playing this difficult JRPG. Anyways, you get a collectible card from other players and, if they choose, a free demon attack during a battle. I was able to call on three StreetPassers during the boss fight to free the fast travel terminal, and it helped a lot. Hope to pass more players this upcoming weekend at Tampa Bay Comic Con!

But I don’t know where to go next, Shin Megami Tensei IV. Wandering aimlessly is okay for a bit, but not forever. Please help.

Level-5’s short story about an attack of tokusatsu shows

Attack of the Friday Monsters! A Tokyo Tale is not really a game. It has a couple game-like elements to it, such as collecting glims to craft monster trading cards and battling with friends to gain power and superiority over them, but it’s more or less a short story about being a kid in a Tokyo suburb in the 1970s when tokusatsu shows were wildly popular. These are the type of television programming where giant monsters battle against larger-than-life heroes against a bustling city skyline. Think Kamen Rider and Power Rangers mixed with kaiju monster flicks like Gamera. I’m aware of them, but they’re not my kind of go-to entertainment choice…unless they are being poked and prodded by Joel and Crow via Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Anyways, after a total of three hours, I’m happy to have played Attack of the Friday Monsters!, but I wish it had been more. You control a young boy named Sohta living in a small town in the Tokyo suburbs. Your parents send you out on a simple delivery errand, with your Mom reminding you as you go that today is Friday, which means the monsters come out. She says it quite casually, and everyone in town is fine with the fact that this happens. As you explore the town, you meet some other kids and become friends with them. They teach Sohta how to play Monster Cards, which is based around Rock, Paper, Scissors, with some additional elements to it to determine ties. When you beat someone at Monster Cards, you become their master, now able to cast a silly spell on them to cause them to fall down dramatically. It’s pretty whimsical and innocent, reminding me a bit of my one time playing…you know, I no longer remember the name of the card game. Had something to do with spells and potions.

I played through Attack of the Friday Monsters! over two nights, but one could bang it out in a single setting. However, there is no reason to rush. Take your time and bask in the sereneness of the town, listen to the cicadas, watch the train chug on by. Setting is the star here. I found the story to be pretty light-hearted and teetering on nonsensical, but never offensive. There’s a couple of real cute moments, and keeping the Japanese voiceover work is always good. Also, that opening theme song is stellar. Quests overlap in the same style that mysteries opened and resolved in the Professor Layton series, and your reward for finishing up a task is always more glims. The monster cards are pretty cool looking in terms of art design, and you can combine multiple copies to increase the strength of one card, but other than that…the minigame is probably about 60% luck and 40% skill and never stressful or demanding that you grind for stronger cards. Just give it a go, and good luck.

The game’s titular attack was also a bit of a letdown, in how it ultimately played out. Visually, it’s a lot of fun. But honestly, I was expecting more giant monster stuff throughout, and there’s really only one instance of it, and you are basically a tiny part of the play. After the credits roll, you are placed back in town, free to run around and collect more glims, as well as battle your friends with Monster Cards. I did a quick tour of every place open once more to get what I could, but did not pick up any new quests to do, and so it seems like the only way now to get more glims is to win the card minigame over and over, which, if it was more like Tetra Master, I’d be into. Oh snap. But alas, it’s nothing to write home about.

So yeah, Attack of the Friday Monsters!, a really charming and peaceful tale about being a kid and creating your own world of fun–but just that. A tale.

2013 Game Review Haiku, #23 – Attack of the Friday Monsters! A Tokyo Tale

Monsters, aliens
And kids with card games, a lost
Charming childhood

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These little haikus proved to be quite popular in 2012, so I’m gonna keep them going for another year. Or until I get bored with them. Whatever comes first. If you want to read more words about these games that I’m beating, just search around on Grinding Down. I’m sure I’ve talked about them here or there at some point. Anyways, enjoy my videogamey take on Japanese poetry.

SMT IV’s Minotaur boss is one loud wake up call

After dying four times during the tutorial section of Shin Megami Tensei IV, I’ve succumb to the blurry darkness a bunch more since then. Probably too many times to keep counting, actually. For a few of those deaths, I revived myself by paying Charon a hefty sum of Macca; other instances saw me just reload to an old save, losing a bit of progress, but keeping me out of downward spiral of debt. I now have the option to use Play Coins to return to the land of the living, but asking for nine is a bit too steep for my shoes, especially when I need to conserve them for Animal Crossing: New Leaf and Find Mii II. So yeah, life as a Samurai is hard, which I should have expected from my earlier time with Devil Summoner Overclocked, but I didn’t realize just how fast and cruel the Press Turn system can be, despite how enjoyable it is when it operates in my favor.

It all becomes clear when you reach the Minotaur boss fight, a few levels deep in Naraku. He’s weak to ice spells like Bufu, and you can get quite a few hits in before it is his turn to attack, but once he does…well, he wipes out my team in a single sweep thanks to the Press Turn system and smirking. I’m not sure exactly if I’m doing anything wrong specifically or chuck it up to bad luck, but it’s been a roadblock for sure. I’d say I’ve taken him on maybe five or six times now, just reloading an old save instead of going into debt with Charon. Boo and grrr and I’ll get you yet, you disturbing piece of Dali-esque artwork.

Until I’m strong enough or lucky enough to beat the Minotaur, I’m grinding and doing side stuff. Like collecting gryphon tails. And downloading free items from the store. No, wait. I’m actually downloading the quests that will allow me to gain these items, but they still require work/items, like 10 or so Life Stones. Every now and then I pop into the Cathedral of Shadows to see what I can do with fusion, but that place is scary and I’m always worried that I’m going to waste a good demon unit to create a subpar one. Right now, I’m rocking…you know, I can’t remember their names specifically and don’t have my 3DS open to check. Hmm, one is the weird connected horses beast. The other looks like a boar. I’m sorry, I just don’t have space in my brain to remember what these crazy critters are called, not when that information is fighting against Game of Thrones theory details and all 108 Stars of Destiny. Also trying to save up all my App points so I can buy the “recover MP while walking” one, quickly followed by “recover HP while walking” right after it–those seem like must-haves.

I’ll be back soon, Minotaur, to try again. If you have any handy tips on how to knock him out fast, please share. I don’t want this to be a permanent roadblock.

Died four times during Shin Megami Tensei IV’s first hour

So, yesterday, I picked up Shin Megami Tensei IV. At first, I couldn’t find it on the shelf at my local GameStop, not realizing that SMT IV got the special Atlus love, seeing it packaged it with a nice art/strategy book and soundtrack CD, placing it in a larger-than-norm 3DS box. Regardless, I got my copy and was able to play around an hour or so last night before I passed out before I could even enjoy the absurdity that is the Feedback Booth on Antiques Roadshow. Anyways, Atlus’ new role-playing adventure is cool, but I died four times and am not even out of the training tutorial thingy yet. Looks like it’s gonna be Devil Summoner Overclocked all over again.

SMT IV begins with a booming voice telling you that your choices will not just affect yourself. Yeah, that’s obvious. We call that living. And then, suddenly, your first choice is upon you: name the protagonist. I deleted Flynn and typed in Pauly. What happens next is unclear, but has you running around a destroyed landscape speaking with some folks that say cryptic things. It’s probably a dream. When you speak to a young girl who asks you to revive her, you are transported elsewhere, to the Eastern Kingdom of Mikado. Your buddy Isshachar introduces himself and tells you a bit about the Gauntlet Rite, which allows people to become Samurai.

To cut to the chase, Pauly is successful in becoming a Samurai. Afterwards, he meets some other graduates: Walter, Jonathan, Navarre, and Isabeau. Under the stern guidance of a man ironically named Hope, we five must endure some training exercises in Naraku, the Hall of Flame. These are basically tutorial stuff, which help you learn the basics of moving around an environment, how your chit-chatty menu device Burroughs works, and various aspects of combat (press turn, recruiting, leveling up). I was able to get through the first few quests just fine, but the last one–well, I assume it is the last one–which involves finding a specific item for Hope has consequently kicked my butt four times in a row. That’s because there’s a boss guarding the item, and it’s able to wipe out Pauly and company in two turns. We’re either underpowered, it’s either overpowered, or the game is just ridiculously hard from the get-go.

Now, when you die in SMT IV, you are transported to the Underworld. The Nether Realm. The Deadlands. I dunno. It’s a place of lost souls, and a man named Charon there will offer to revive you to the point just before where you died…for a price. Basically, some of your Macca, maybe about 75%. If you don’t have enough, he’ll still revive you, but put your bill on a tab, which you’ll have to pay later. I think I saw a forum thread somewhere mentioning that you can eventually use Play Coins too. The second time I died I was taken elsewhere, since Charon was busy sucking souls or something, and offered the ability to now change the difficulty level. Two more deaths after that have just resulted in a large tab.

I’m really looking forward to more demon recruiting though, as that aspect seems completely zany and random and wonderful. That’s where the real quirk shows up so far, followed by Burroughs calling me, “Hot stuff.” Recruiting is a multiple choice guessing game, wherein you might gain a friend, make an enemy, or just cause a demon to run away. I’ve not had much luck, getting only a…you know, I don’t really know the names of these demons. One is two centaurs joined, another is a gooey zombie, and the other is some kind of creepy doll. Have not opened up the ability to fuse and stuff, but I’m sure that’ll be soon enough.

A rough start, but I’m not deterred. Tonight I will do some more grinding and running back to the barracks to rest up and heal for free before I try to take on the item-guarding boss again. Ideally, I’d like Pauly to be around level 6, as well as my team of demons. That said, I need to recruit a few more, especially one with some healing magic. Don’t know if those thrive in Naraku or not. We’ll see, SMT IV. Pray for my soul.

Mean gnomes, friendly fire, tenacious towers, extra elements, and goliath beetles

Alas, I’m still not in a place to really write at length about the videogames I’m playing (or thinking about playing). Y’know, unless that writing is really short and in the form of a haiku. This hard swing seems to happen every summer, and it’s mostly because I’m extremely stressed to day jobbery things that I won’t ever go into publicly and working on laying out a book of my 365 BAD COMICS, but I am still Pauly, which means I am playing games whether there are words to attach to them or not because they help soothe my soul. I figured it’d be easier to give y’all a little rundown on what I’m playing as of late and how it’s going than waiting for the inevitable to never happen.

And away we go.

Fable III

Well, this is not a very good game, in all aspects of something being a game. No, sir. It’s janky and lazy and poorly paced and unclear in its directions and overly interested in telling the player silly data, and I hate the “no menu” mentality, as there is nothing wrong with menus, so long as the menus are designed properly. The dog is pointless to the point of annoying and should have been left behind; that was Fable 2‘s thing. Being the king of Albion is not as cool or special as one might assume. I’m currently right near the end-all battle, but I want to clean up all the remaining side quests (finding gnomes, silver keys, gold keys) because I am never going to play this again. I’m glad it was free, but I’m sad to see how dry and drained it is compared to the previous adventure, something I enjoyed. There are still some very pretty locales and cool beard options though.

Battlefield 3

This is a game I really do want to write more about at length, as I’m playing it for educational purposes, to figure out what it is about realistic, war-themed FPS titles that I find so uninteresting and off-putting. So far, this game has all of that–whatever it is–and then some. I’m also finding it extremely difficult to see due to how real and dark the environments are, accidentally shooting my own teammates. Thankfully, friendly fire is in play–though the game openly states such actions will not be tolerated–so I’m not ruining missions at every turn. But yeah. I’ve done ground fights, tank fights, sky fights, sniper stuff, and so on. It’s pretty boring.

Defense Grid: The Awakening

This is the first free game for us Xbox 360 players with Gold accounts. It’s an old, downloadable RTS game from a few years back, with upgradable towers. It’s slow, as slow as if I was to actually build a tower myself, but I was able to play a few levels past the tutorial stuff. Not sure if I’ll hop back into it, as it is almost the exact opposite of the only RTS game I’ve really enjoyed recently: Kingdom Rush. Oh well.

Chrono Cross

I’m now at the turning point of my sorta re-play of Chrono Cross where I’m experiencing parts I’ve never gotten to before. This is exciting. I always got to the moment in time where Serge and Lynx do the Freaky Friday and then lost interest quickly after that. Despite some hiccups, this replay has been pretty steadily chugging along, and I’m now working on beating a bunch of dragon gods into submission. I still absolutely love the music and the battle system with a passion unlike anything else. More about Chrono Cross later, I promise.

Animal Crossing: New Leaf

I am loving my new daily life as mayor of Arni in Animal Crossing: New Leaf, but am taking it pretty slow. In fact, I’ve only gone to the island four or five times now, and that’s the place many players hop to and from to earn big bells thanks to the special beetles they got there. Just finished expanding the museum with a second floor and gift shop, and am now working on increasingly my house to have a larger second room. That’s gonna be where I put all my Japanese furniture. Other than that, it’s the same ol’ addiction and easygoing gameplay from the previous game, and the emergent gameplay in multiplayer is a joy to watch unfold.

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So that’s the handful of games I’m currently playing. Pretty exciting, I know. I’m also contemplating if I’ll pick up Shin Megami Tensei IV or not tomorrow. Hmm, we’ll see…

2013 Game Review Haiku, #22 – Mario VS. Donkey Kong

Collect the gold key
Save mini Mario toy
Give Donkey Kong his

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These little haikus proved to be quite popular in 2012, so I’m gonna keep them going for another year. Or until I get bored with them. Whatever comes first. If you want to read more words about these games that I’m beating, just search around on Grinding Down. I’m sure I’ve talked about them here or there at some point. Anyways, enjoy my videogamey take on Japanese poetry.