Daily Archives: February 3, 2012

Resident Evil: Revelations is portable horror and so not for me

I’m attracted to horror games from a distance. Truly, I am. I just don’t enjoy playing them, and this is pretty evident with the fact that Silent Hill 2 still remains unfinished despite Tara keeping me company through all the fog and static-laden radio noises and creepy monsters that want to spray me with their evil juices. I love the atmosphere and story and crazy enemy designs in horror games, but I just can’t handle the packed-in stress, the long stretches that build between scare A and scare B, the way tiny sounds like turning a doorknob are deafening and that general feeling of utter helplessness.

Also, a quick gander at my backlog confirms a solid lack of horror videogames. Yes, there’s BioShock, which I played and completed, but struggled with for awhile, often just standing still for long periods of time thanks to a “turn invisible when not moving” Plasmid and listening to my surroundings. I’ve dipped my toes into the terrifying pools called Penumbra: Overture and Amnesia: The Dark Descent, but have no desire to go swimming. And in my younger years, yes, I played a few Resident Evil games, but those were social affairs, adventures that my best friend and I would go on together, with chips and drinks and puppy dogs at our sides to make the real world as safe as possible in lieu of the dangerous digital version; the vivid memory of a licker bursting threw a one-sided mirror still makes me tense up.

That said, after a busy day of drawing journal comics every hour on the hour, I downloaded the demo for Resident Evil: Revelations on my 3DS–yes, the system now supports demos; praise be to the Maker, it must be the year 2012–and give it a whirl. To clarify, the last Resident Evil game I played with passion and purpose was probably Resident Evil 2 though I did try a demo for Resident Evil 5, which was lame.

Firstly, this is a gorgeous-looking game. The graphics definitely show off what the 3DS can handle, and the 3D slider flicked slightly up creates a fantastic look, really drawing me in, as if I’m walking right behind Jill as she badly shoots zombies on a haunted cruiser ship. Well, no. Not zombies. Scary, mutated monsters. Secondly, without that crazy Circle Pro Pad attachment, this game controls horribly, especially during the moments when quick, precise turning is needed. You know, like when a monster is trying to eat your face off. See, without a second circle analog pad, you both move Jill and move the camera at the same time with the one circle pad you got. It’s horrible; I’d switch over to first-person shooting mode to pop a monster in the middle of its temple only to have my aim swirling around out of control. Thirdly–and lastly–this game can manage scares just fine. You’d think, being on a brightly teal-colored handheld device, which has a number of lights on at any given time, it wouldn’t be able to create such an atmosphere, but it does. One monster jumped down from the ceiling, and I emitted a sound. I will not describe it.

And then I ran out of ammo. And then I died in a foggy room filled with scary things. I exited out of the demo and saw that I now have 29 more chances to get scared. No thanks. But I can see why many would like Resident Evil: Revelations: high production values, quality scares, beautiful graphics, and an actual story to follow. Alas, this type of game is still not for me even when playing safely under the blankets with warmth, cats, and a wife to keep me safe. Oh well. Good thing for demos.

Achievements of the Week – The Krogan Takes Up Arms and Says Tank You Very Much Edition

How is it Friday already again? Wasn’t it just Friday this last Friday? Y’know, one Friday ago? Ugh. These weeks are blurring by, and it’s probably because I have so much to do. And I’m not referencing videogames here. I have real life stuff, car stuff, and preparations for MegaCon piling up. So I’m keeping this update here real short.

Let’s begin.

From Saints Row: The Third…


Tank You Very Much (20G): Completed all instances of Tank Mayhem.

Just completed another activity in Saints Row: The Third, which involved spamming the “shoot missiles” button and driving forward, and you can see which ones were my favorite right over here.

From The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim…


Take Up Arms (10G): Join the Companions

Got bored doing the ol’ back and forth stuff for the Thieves Guild so I decided it was high time I joined a new guild and became the best of the best there. Getting into the Companions is relatively tame; you speak to their leader, who has you duel with a subordinate–the fight was over with one swipe of my Nightingale Blade–and then that guy gives you a sword to take to a smith at the Skyforge. Return back and poof, you’re in. Now what?

From Mass Effect 2…


Technician (15G): Obtain 10 technology upgrades


The Krogan (10G): Successfully recruit the krogan

I popped Mass Effect 2 back in last night and couldn’t remember what exactly I was suppose to do. I was inside the Citadel, but that was it. I walked around for a bit, chatting with locals, doing an endorsement for a weapons shop, eventually making my way to a meeting with the Council. After that, I skipped around the galaxy map, landing on the first planet I came across that had the “land” option. Turns out, this place was where I’d be able to recruit a new member for my team. Sah-weet. Good times, even if my Shephard did a not-so-nice thing to a krogan back in Mass Effect.

Okay, that’s it. My goal this weekend is to do a ton of comics work and not watch the Super Bowl as I just don’t care, so there might not be much gaming. Eh, I always say that, and there’s always some gaming. Especially now that I want to go on my next recruiting mission in Mass Effect 2 even though I have no idea who to go after next. Must ponder some more.

How have y’all been doing Achievements-wise? Speak up in the comments below. Go ahead. It doesn’t cost a dime.