Daily Archives: January 4, 2012

Saints Row: The Third should not have all this fun power

Honestly, I never thought I’d write these words, but I’m having a blast with Saints Row: The Third. The duders over at GiantBomb are mostly to blame, as they would not shut up about the game on every podcast or game of the year debate, and so I finally decided to put my trust in word-of-mouth and got a new copy with some Christmas cash (as well as Kirby’s Epic Yarn, Rage, and Marvel VS Capcom 3 during GameStop’s end-of-the-month sale where you could buy two used games and get one for free). I put it into my Xbox 360 without a real idea of what was to come except maybe some driving and shooting in the vein of Grand Theft Auto IV, a game I loathe. I held my breath and went forward…

Well, I’m about 11 hours into Saints Row: The Third, with a completion percentage around 45%, and it’s been zany, crazy fun from the moment go. From creating your character, to jumping out of a plane, to jumping into a plane, to gimps pulling chariots, to said gimps exploding, to driving Miss Tiger around town, to befriending a huge naked man, to–y’know, I think I’ll stop there for now. Literally every mission is absolutely bonkers and pure joy to talk about, but a majority of it needs to be experienced, as Saints Row: The Third is always aiming to surprise and put a smile on your face. And if not a smile, well, maybe just to lower your jaw a couple inches. In short, it’s a videogame. It’s a videogame that loves being a videogame and only wants to be a videogame for you. It streamlines everything to keep momentum going forward; when you are driving to a mission start locale, you don’t have to get out of the car to begin it, you only need to be near it, and while that’s a small detail, it’s enough to keep things going. Unlike GTA IV, failing a mission is not punishing, as there are many checkpoints along the way, and you can simply reload from there. And hey, do you hate chasing down a car to hijack it? Simply run and press the right button to jump through the car’s windshield immediately. It’s that kind of game.

And yeah, that’s my avatar in the screenshot above. He’s modeled somewhat after moi. You can use the in-game’s cell phone to take screenshots and upload them to a separate website, so expect some more National Geographic quality shots to pop up here and there. I like to dress kinda casual though I do put on a zany hat or kooky outfit when showing the game off to observers. And there was this one time I was wearing a wolf mask and a cheerleading outfit, but let’s just move on, okay…

Got some Achievements so far. This game looks like a fairly easy 1,000 Gamerscore, but it’ll take time, which is a-okay by me. For once, I’m having a blast in an open world with little fear of breaking it or losing all my hard-earned work through things getting too crazy and my dude getting shot to pieces, like in The Saboteur or Red Faction: Guerrilla. Here’s a few goodies:

Ow, My Balls! (10G): Did your first nutshot and testicle assault, sack tapping is bad news kids!

Gellin’ Like Magellan (20G): Explored every hood in Steelport, you’ve been around the world.

Gotta Break Em In (25G): Completed ‘The Ho Boat’ and decided the Hos fate, do you feel proud of yourself?

I do feel proud of myself, Volition/THQ. I saved those hoes from a life of hoeing and whoring under a wrestling masked jerk to work for me, the leader of the Saints, who, by all accounts, is a psychopath. Lucky them.

Right now, before I move on to the next story mission, I’m tracking down all the collectibles thanks to an upgrade bonus that highlights them all on my map. Saints Row: The Third doesn’t care about giving you everything right away, such as a map pinpointing all the hidden items or a VTOL jet early on or the ability to call an airstrike at any point; it just wants you to have a good time, and that’s exactly what I’m going to keep on doing.

30 Days of Gaming meme is now completed

It took me 287 days to complete the 30 Days of Gaming meme, which is a list of thirty topic trains meant to be derailed one after the other in thirty consecutive days. Another way to look at it is as so: 9 months and 12 days. Let’s go further down the rabbit hole and reduce the final count to these: 24,796,800 seconds or 413,280 minutes or 6,888 hours or 41 weeks. Fun with numbers, I know. It’s all the rage on blogs these days.

Yeah, I never promised I’d be fast with the meme, as it was meant to fill in the gaps at Grinding Down, but at some point, I just forgot about it for a good while and then later struggled with some of the tougher topics. But I have triumphed, and so here’s the roundup of all those posts. Clicky click, y’all.

Day 1 – Your first videogame (Super Mario World)
Day 2 – Your favorite character (Gremio from Suikoden)
Day 3 – A game that is underrated (Primal)
Day 4 – Your guilty pleasure game (Pokemon White)
Day 5 – Game character you feel you most like (Joker from Mass Effect)
Day 6 – Most annoying character (Tom Nook from Animal Crossing: Wild World)
Day 7 – Favorite game couple (Fran and Balthier from Final Fantasy XII)
Day 8 – Best soundtrack (Chrono Cross)
Day 9 – Saddest game scene (Nanami’s death in Suikoden II)
Day 10 – Best gameplay (Sly 3: Honor Among Thieves)
Day 11 – Gaming system of choice (Nintendo DS)
Day 12 – A game everyone should play (Limbo)
Day 13 – A game you’ve played more than five times (Super Metroid)
Day 14 – Current (or most recent) gaming wallpaper
Day 15 – Post a screenshot from the game you’re playing right now (Harvest Moon: Grand Bazaar)
Day 16 – Game with the best cut scenes (Jak 3)
Day 17 – Favorite antagonist
Day 18 – Favorite protagonist Craziest thing in a game (Zodiac Spear in Final Fantasy XII)
Day 19 – Picture of a game setting you wish you lived in (Fable II)
Day 20 – Favorite genre (RPGs)
Day 21 – Game with the best story (Suikoden II)
Day 22 – A game sequel which disappointed you (Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty)
Day 23 – Game you think had the best graphics or art style (Aquaria)
Day 24 – Favorite classic game (Pac-Man)
Day 25 – A game you plan on playing (Deus Ex: Human Revolution)
Day 26 – Best voice acting (Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain)
Day 27 – Most epic scene ever (Mother Brain boss fight in Super Metroid)
Day 28 – Favorite game developer (Konami)
Day 29 – A game you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up loving (LEGO Star Wars: The Video Game)
Day 30 – Your favorite game of all time (The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past)

Whew. Lots to read. Or not, that’s your call. To speak nicely of my own writing for a moment–and trust me, this does not happen a lot, as self-deprecation is my main form of medication–I’m pretty proud of the posts for Day 2, Day 5, Day 9, and Day 11. These are more personal than traditional, the kind of writing where there’s a story before we get to the meat of things. I dunno. Overall, I’m kind of meh about how this meme went and turned out, and I suspect I won’t be doing another for a long while. I think I am better at videogame musing off the cuff, and I now never want to write about my favorite videogame ever again; it just can’t be done, folks. Unless you’re Jeremy Parish.

All right, moving on now…